Tori's Stories

Birthday party It was the middle of a humid April night when I reached down, touched K’s head, and felt the warmth on my hand. Yep, his fever was back. I kneeled at his bedside, and tried to figure out the right amount of Tylenol to give him at a time so he would keep it all down in between dramatic coughs. This wasn’t new; it had been going on for a couple of weeks.  In that moment, I knew the right thing to do was to ask God to heal his little body. Everything I had ever been taught had told me to do that. Isn’t that what a good Christian is supposed to do? But I couldn’t.  I stayed at his bedside, fighting back tears, and jumping to dramatic conclusions. Sometimes when we have prayed for God’s healing, he made the child completely whole and took them to go live with him. I didn’t want that answer. I couldn’t put this child in God’s hands. I wanted my own outcome. I wanted to be able to hold him in my arms for days and months and years to come. I wanted to b...

I’ve written many blogs in my head and even began some on paper lately.   But putting my thoughts into words has been hard lately. Instead, tonight I was reminded of something else that needs shared. The happy moments. The moments that make me smile more than I have all day. The moments that make everything worth it. The moments that remind me why I do what I do. Sometimes bedtimes are really rough. I might get scratched in the face or my glasses might be on the verge of breaking for the 20 th time that day. Many times my hair gets pulled or I get bit. Other times, like tonight as I sang bedtime songs we have a moment of calm. I was holding one of my children who often does all of the above and she began to sing along. Hearing her sing about Jesus’ love instead of what happens on other nights, makes it all worth it. When we don’t know if a child will ever smile and she laughs at 2 years old, it makes it all worth it. When I see a picture of one of my chil...

Remember this post  http://torirayle.blogspot.com/2015/05/the-promise-house.html? It was all about my newest adventure, living in the Promise House. Before I moved in, we knew a couple would be returning to COTP to be the long term house parents of this space in early 2016. I was just filling in in the interim. Well, its early 2016 and they will be arriving on Monday.  I'm so excited for the kids to have someone in their house who can think up assistive devices and make them out out whatever he can find. I've come up with ideas, but do not know how to make them. I'm really glad these kids are going to have a nurse caring for their day to day needs who can see their medical needs I may passover and who will advocate fiercely for them to get the care they need. I know Wilson and Sheila will love them dearly. I have so enjoyed living in the Promise House and getting to know these kids and nannies more over the last nine months. It has been so great to watch them ...

Sweet Wadley, September 12, 2015. Your 5 th birthday and the day you got to run into Jesus’ arms. It wasn’t supposed to go the way it did. We were praying hard for your forever family to find you. We had plans for a beautiful cake and a party on Monday. Instead you got a much better birthday than we could ever have done and a much better family than we ever could have imagined. I miss your cuddles, the way your arms would fall around my neck when I picked you up and held you just so. I miss hanging out under the mango tree with you, reading, cuddling, and just talking about what was going on around us. I miss comforting you when you weren’t feeling well. I miss greeting you each morning and every time I walk in the door. I miss rubbing your head and kissing you on the cheek as I leave the house. I miss helping you do motions to songs in school. I miss helping you practice sitting up. I miss helping you color, shake an instrument, or discover a n...

The sound of laughter of pure joy from a child Our main space The smell of rice, beans, sauce, and meat cooking on the stove The sight of children working on mastering new skills The feeling of love when cuddled up with a child The sight of a child’s face lighting up with a big smile knowing they are loved The excitement of a child beginning to crawl, sitting on their own, or playing well The sound of nannies talking amongst themselves as children nap The sound of music playing in the background Each of these sound like a part of a typical home. Each of these are present in the new Promise House at COTP. We currently have eight children from one to eight years old living in this space, all with varying forms of special needs. Each child plays a special part in this home and each child is worth it all. Our oldest goes to school in the morning. He is very active and loves to play on the playground, run around, and do gymnastic like activitie...